Or, at least, so believes one local woman.

"It was just after 10PM I'd just let Wee Paul out the front of the shop to do his 'business'," Whiteman's employer and landlady, Betty Tailor told us, "and naturally turned my back to give him some privacy - I'm not a monster."

BRIGHT LIGHT

Continued Betty (87): "Next thing I knew there was a bright light, a loud, mechanical noise, and what sounded like a metal hatch being slammed shut."

"I turned round in time to see two eerie red light speeding of from the front of the shop, and Wee Paul was nowhere to be seen!"

According to the shopkeeper and alleged murderess, the red lights were hovering in the darkness around a foot and a half off the ground with no visible means of support.

ALIENS

Though initially hesitant to get the police involved, Betty was forced to recount her spooky tale to Constable McClelland, after the officer overheard the elderly spinster shouting "Aliens! Wee Paul's been taken by fecking aliens!" at the top of her voice.

After listening to her story, McClelland - himself no stranger to the world of the unexplained - agreed that the events did indeed "suggest an abduction by an entity or entities from a world beyond our galaxy".

"Or a car," the officer added.

At present, Paul's whereabouts are still unknown, though Betty still remains hopeful that he'll soon return to the small room he inhabits under her stairs - perhaps drawn back by the promise of "one square meal a day" and the familiar smell of the favourite blanket he uses as a makeshift bed every night.